This isn’t the version of my life I imagined I’d be writing about.
Not at this age. Not after everything I’ve learned, everything I’ve done.
But here we are—at the backline of midlife, neck-deep in a career pivot with a wallet that’s lighter than it should be, a heart still full of fire, and a head that won’t stop asking:
“Why the hell is this so hard?”
Let’s just call it what it is: rebuilding a life, a career, a lifetime of experience—after spending years doing work that I was good at but not always proud of—is complicated.
I’m not new to this game. I’ve helped companies rake in more than six figures a day. I’ve built email programs that converted cold leads into memberships faster than most people could write a subject line. I’ve seen the inside of success. I’ve tasted it. I’ve run with it.
And I’ve also attempted to walk away from it. Always returning for the ALMIGHTY DOLLAR
The Industry I Left Behind
Here’s the truth, and I’m not here to sugar-coat it:
I built my skill set, developed my experience in the online adult industry at one of the companiesthat pioneered affiliate marketing programs and online processing for credit cards. I was behind the screen—running marketing and affiliate programs, dialing in email sequences, and making numbers move.
I made my name with a product called Psychicrealm—over 30 paid conversions a day from cold traffic. That landed me the opportunity to take over Naughty Mail, an email product the company had just bought. That’s where I really learned the craft—building high-volume, high-conversion email systems that made $150k a month for one product alone.
I’m proud of the work I did, but not proud of the industry I did it in. That tension sat in my gut for years. I knew I had the skills. I just didn’t want to keep using them for someone else’s bottom line—especially when the product wasn’t something I could stand behind.
The Pull to Do Something of My Own
That’s been the throughline for years.
That ache to build something real. Something mine.
And if I’m honest, the first time I really followed that pull was when I started a project called Sliding Glass.
I didn’t know what I was doing technically—I just grabbed a camera and went. I shot surf, I shot wakeboarding, I followed my instincts. I’m a water sports junky and a rock and roll junky, and that project brought both together in a way that made me feel completely alive.
The content I created. The relationships I built.
That was mine. And I was so damn proud of it.
Sliding Glass was a moment of clarity—proof that I could build something I believed in. That I could tell stories that mattered to me. That I didn’t need anyone’s permission to just start.
The Moment I Almost Jumped—and Didn’t
In January 2023, I was in Playa del Carmen. I’d just been let go—three months earlier than planned. It should have been the moment I went all in.
I took a trip to El Cuyo, sat with it all, and knew I had the means to make the leap.
And then I didn’t.
Not fully. I told myself I would. But instead, I floated. I enjoyed the freedom. Maybe a little too much.
But that moment planted something. And slowly, it grew into what I’m building now.
Building Something Real (Across Three Brands)
I didn’t just want ShiverMedia, the agency.
I realized I’ve always needed more than just a single lane.
So I started building three distinct spaces:
• ShiverMedia – digital marketing and design, grounded in strategy and storytelling for small businesses
• SamiMartin – personal brand: stories, wellness, growth, midlife pivots in the backline, and saltwater truths
• Salty Blue Mexico – documenting ocean adventures, reef conservation, travel stories rooted in place and purpose
These brands let me bring all of me to the table—creative, strategic, personal, and passionate. Each one fuels the work I actually want to do. Not just for income, but for impact.
What I’m Doing Now (And What Lights Me Up)
These days, I’m offering what I know how to do best:
• Brand development and logo design
• Email marketing and lifecycle campaigns
• Social media strategy and content planning
• Real estate photo and video here on the island
• Teaching tools and digital downloads
• AI prompting and visual content creation—because I’ve always stayed ahead of the tech
And for the first time in a long time, I feel like I’m doing work that matters.
The Puerta al Cielo shoot? Climbing up to shoot a rooftop trampoline install? That’s the stuff I live for.
Planning and executing the Izla Hotel content strategy? Right in my flow.
Branding work and storytelling with Turquoise Tides Travel? Deeply fulfilling.
Even covering the Island Time Music Festival felt like everything I care about—music, visuals, storytelling—colliding in the best way.
This is the kind of work that makes me feel useful. Grounded. Alive.
The Brutal Truth: The Money Sucks Right Now
Let’s be real. I’m in debt.
One of my anchor clients is on pause.
I’m living gig to gig, holding my breath, and hoping the tide shifts soon.
And still—I’ve never been clearer about what I’m here to do.
I’m grateful for the people who have shown up for me. The ones who’ve reminded me that support doesn’t always come with fanfare—it just shows up.
Because yeah, it’s hard.
But I’m not lost.
I’m just rebuilding slower, with more intention.
What Giving Up Would Look Like—and Why I’m Not
There are moments I think about quitting.
Getting a job that pays just to get out of debt.
Leaving Mexico.
Starting over again.
But quitting has never meant rest to me—it’s always meant regret.
And I’m not ready to trade my dreams for someone else’s routine.
I don’t want to be the person who walked away right before it all clicked.
I’ve done that before.
I’m not doing it again.
What Semi-Retirement Looks Like to Me
I’m not trying to buy a house in the suburbs.
I’m not chasing six figures for bragging rights.
Semi-retirement, to me, means this:
• I’ve paid off the debt
• I’ve got consistent income from what I’ve built
• I’m able to travel when I want
• I’m living in beach towns, working from my laptop
• I’m documenting surf, reef life, and salty living
• I’ve got a partner who rides alongside me
• I feel healthy, strong, free—and finally me
That’s the plan. And I know it’s possible.
Success has never been a corner office.
It’s only ever been a means to an end.
What Success Looks Like Now
Success is:
• Creating with heart
• Earning from my skills without selling out
• Supporting myself while doing work I believe in
• Teaching, mentoring, telling stories that matter
• Contributing, not just consuming
• Feeling proud of what I leave behind
It’s not about the numbers.
It’s about the alignment.
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Final Word: The Tide Is Turning
I don’t have it all figured out.
But I’m still in the water.
Still paddling.
Still chasing the set I know is coming.
This isn’t how I thought it would be.
But maybe this is the version I needed all along.
Not polished. Not easy.
But mine.
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